My Mother - Your Grandma

Hello children, mom here...

I have rarely talked to you about my mother.  I guess for  many years it was because I was so angry with her, and I just couldn't, didn't want to, talk about her at all!  But times are changing, and I've found forgiveness, and I want to be able to tell you about her..at least a little bit.

Where shall I begin?  My mom was, really, a pretty special lady.  She was an incredibly hard worker.  She loved my dad.  She loved us, too, the best she knew how.  While I have always been able to remember her anger - I'm finding more and more how I'm able to remember the good things about her.  Which is what I wanted to share with you.

Even as I write this, I remember her face.  Her nose had a little crook in it, like a bumpy ski slope.  Her hair and makeup where always kept done 'just so'.  She had curly, really dark brown hair that she put up in curlers every night before bed.  I can't even remember ever seeing her hair before the curlers.  I don't know whether it was even curly, or straight.  She was a big woman for many years.  Then she became ill, and had to eat nothing but baby food for months.  She lost all her weight, then.  It was a year or so before I got married.  You will see by her picture at my wedding just how thin she became.

My mom was feisty, too.  She had a mind of her own and didn't mind using it.  I did not inherit that part of her.  I wish I had.  It seemed like two of my sisters got it, and myself and your aunt Barb did not.  Oh well.  Of my mom and dad, she was the most outspoken of the two.  Dad was fairly quiet and reserved.  

One thing I loved about my mom was her ability to recite poetry.  Do you remember any of the poems I recited to you when you were little?  I only remembered two, but there were many more.  I used to sit by her and she'd recite to me and I'd love it....

She also made all my clothes.  Yes, sewed them all herself!  And she made sure, somehow, even though we had very little money, that we were all so nicely dressed, especially on Sunday mornings.  I remember some of the outfits she made me....and as I got older, into my early teens, I remember not being so thankful she was making my clothes. I always felt out of place at school - always felt I looked 'different' and it made me feel awkward.  And of course I would get mad at mom.....I remember one jacket she made for me, and she spent weeks and weeks (and weeks) embroidering a huge picture on the back of my jacket.  And when she finished it I wouldn't wear it.  She must have felt hurt by that...it makes me sad to think of it.

I remember her laugh...funny, hey, how I can remember that after so long?  Maybe it was because it was more of a cackle....hehe...she would throw her head back and...and....cackle is the only word I can come up with!  My mom was also tone deaf...literally, she sounded like a cat being murdered when she sang.  (And I don't think she'd mind my saying so!)  Problem was, she LIKED to sing, and we'd all give her a hard time when she did so....

She was always well-dressed - never went outside the house in anything but a completed outfit.  She was a pretty good cook, as well.  I remember roast beef dinners every Sunday night when she wasn't working.  She worked full time, though, so that was not every week.

She adored her grandkids, and I know she would have adored all of you.  Makes me sad you never got to meet her, honestly.  Makes me sad she left us........but somehow I feel she knows you, anyhow...

Even with all the nonsense that went on in our house, there were good times, too.  And my mom did help create those good times for us.....

Love,

Mom xxoo